Some thoughts for parents of trans kids:
What is representation? Representation is seeing yourself reflected back in the world. Seeing people like you, doing the things that you would like to do. Setting the example. It’s one thing to be told as a young girl, that you can be anything, but if all we see are women being mothers and homemakers, we lack an example. We lack proof.
If we only watch movies with, and read books about, straight families and cisgender kids, we are teaching that those families and those kids are the acceptable, normal, valid families. That they are who we look to as examples of who we want to be.
Kids want to see themselves reflected back. The more isolated and alone they feel in their personal experience, the more they seek out representation in movies, books, and tv. As they look for and fail to find that representation, in their minds, the absence becomes a judgment: people like me are not acceptable and not worthy.
As parents, you can say you love your kid and mean it, and they can feel that love, but they can also wonder if you accept their trans-ness, and even if you accept it, do you value it? How do you demonstrate that you value all of them? We as parents need to show and not just tell. We can show that we value the trans-ness of our kids by valuing it in other people and other people’s stories.
Reading books written by trans folks and watching tv shows with trans kids will help your child understand that you love and value their whole selves. We can do that by choosing movies to watch and books to read with our children to help set an example for them. Also, we can choose tv shows and books with these kinds of stories to read ourselves, to have around the house, and on our bedside tables, and in doing so, walk the walk, not just talk the talk. When we read books by trans authors, we model valuing their experiences and their stories, and we learn by listening.
We recommend great books and movies by trans creators on our Instagram. #translit